datang dan pergi...

perasaan itu mudah datang..

perasaan itu mudah hinggap...

tapi kenapa ia tak mudah untuk pergi?

perasaan itu mudah datang...

tapi bila aku inginkan ia pergi,

setahun, dua tahun, tiga tahun mahupun sepuluh tahun belum tentu ia hilang..

perasaan itu mudah datang...

bukan susah,kau kenal, bercakap, berjumpa, kau dah ada perasaan itu...

perasaan itu mudah datang...

kalau lah perasaan itu seperti mata dakwat yg mudah ditanggalkan,

mesti ia tidak sesiksa ini...

perasaan yang mudah datang itu kadang-kala melemahkan diri kita sendiri...

tiap hari terfikirkannya...tiap hari mengharapkan sesuatu yang belum pasti menjadi milik diriku...

kalaulah ia boleh pergi...

betapa gembiranya diri bila suatu hari aku boleh katakan pada diriku dan pada semua orang dengan lantang bahawa hey,kau bukan lagi pujaanku!..kau bukan lagi harapan aku!..dan kau bukan lagi impianku..!

kalaulah ia boleh pergi...

aku panjangkan syukur kepadamu yang MAHA ESA kerana selama bertahun-tahun aku pendamkan rasa ini, aku mampu mengusirnya dari ingatanku...

kadang-kadang aku rasa persahabatan kita umpama lebih dari apa yang kita panggil kawan..

hey!, orang keliling memandang kita dengan penuh curiga....

hey!, orang keliling kerap memperkatakan kita...

kita bercinta?ada apa-apa kah sama mereka?

tidak!!..kita hanya kawan biasa....

tapi kadang-kadang aku tak rasa kita seperti kawan...entahlah...

kau ada dia..aku cuma aku..namum aku bersyukur kau kawan aku...

kau yang terindah tuhan kurniakan untuk aku...

terima kasih tuhan...

terima kasih kawan...

kalaulah perasaan itu mudah pergi, aku harap kita teruskan berkawan...kerna aku sayang kau KAWAN!~

love,

cmasyaz

why....

I don't ask for your sympathy...i don't ask for any attention..and i don't ask anything from you...it just i need someone to hold on together...i am not as strong as what you see me...i am an ordinary person not yet extra ordinary....

I thought that we are really good n best friends that might share everything, and anything..or maybe it just me who felt that way...maybe i'm just your friend like what u felt towards your friends....whenever u need me i always beside you..but when i need you...where are u dear friend??? i need your support..i need your word of wisdom and i need you when i really need you...i know you are toooo busy with your life..but i don't ask much..just a minutes of your time.....

Maybe you don't have that minutes...maybe you don't have any seconds..ok..i'll deal with it..but please don't blame me if one day i don't act like i used to be towards you....i'm sorry friend...i'm not saying that i want to take a revenge..but deep down in my heart i do hurt with all the things that u did.....i'll try to not make it..because i know how F.R.I.E.N.D word meaning....i'm sorry friend...

love,

cmasyaz

A friend or A lover??

someone said that It is not easy to change friendship into love. But it's even harder to turn love into friendship....betul ker??

tapi kalu dah jodoh nak buat macam mane kan...tuhan tuh maha mengetahui

love,

cmasyaz

benda senang pun susah! @#$%!

hari nih kita cerita pasal make sense...ape yang make sense nyer? ok...here what i'll list down aper yg make sense pasal entry hari nih...bukan nak mempertikaikan tanggungjawab seseorang..tapi cuma nak bukak mata tentang tanggungjawab yang korang patut pikul dan bersama2 membantu org2 yg tak berupaya nih...i do understand that bukan senang nak jadi macam korang..tapi jgn igt kerja korang je susah..semua kerja susah...semua kerja ade susah mereka yang tersendiri...tapi aper yg boleh diperbetulkan tuh..kita cuba perbaiki...

23 mei 2011..ayah vomit yang sangat teruk..plus he looked so tak bermaya..me, my mom n abg crying tgk keadaan dia....he can't eat...he can't drink at all sbb once he try to eat dia kan muntah..muntah yg berwarna hitam yg entah la..tak tau nak ceritakan macam mana...more than 3 times ayah muntah...and the last vomit ayah muntah darah...before that three of us pujuk ayah utk pegi hospital..but then he refused...and mase last vomit tuh we try to pujuk ayah lagi and he agreed with us...alhamdulillah... =)

so...with ayah condition yg tak larat nak bangun...we try to call ambulance...here the make sense will be announced...ok!

1. why we call ambulance?

2. where is the ambulance?

3. who drive the ambulance?

4. how many ambulance do they have?

ok...my abg called ambulance sbb with ayah condition, ktorg tak berani nak angkat dia n dia tak larat nak jalan....bila call...macam biasa..soalan umum yg ditanya...nama,tinggal kat mana,utk aper..HELLO!!untuk aper???hey..sbb ade org sakit la call ambulance duh!!! (make sense yg pertama)

bile dah terangkan..operator tuh kate..ok saya akan sambungkan kepada pihak hospital ok..bengang yg pertama dah mula rasa...bile pihak hospital dah jawab..diaorg tanya lagi nama,tinggal mane, utk aper...HELLO!!!~ what the heck!! ape point anda wahai operator yg pertama utk tanya macam2 tadi....bodoh! -sorry-

yg sengal nyer pulak org yg jawab telephone bahagian kecemasan kat hospital nih bleh tanya macam2 kat my abg...sape name pesakit.umur..then sakit aper....pastuh sejak bile sakit..bila kate muntah dia tanya lagi muntah aper...warna aper....macam mane bleh kena..tadi ade makan aper2 tak...HELLooooo!!! then baru dia tanya duduk mane...

ok here is the part bila my abg kate tinggal kat bandar baru selayang, and kasi alamat sume...dia boleh kate ape tau...owh rumah encik dekat..apa kate encik datang sendiri...sbb ambulance takde..ambulance dekat pinggiran...hey stupid! pinggiran tuh lagi dekat dengan hospital tuh tau la...ape ke sengal la kau nih...

maser dia tgh bebel2 kat tepon tuh..my abg layan kan aje..dia pun dah nak marah sebenarnya sbb muka dah merah2 tapi he said not worth at all adik kalau nak marah time tu! masa tuh i was really angry at that stupid person..i'm hampir nak amek phone tu and bahasa kan that fella.."kau nih bodoh ke ape?tak kan nak tunggu aku kate hey pesakit tuh dah nazak..tunggu masa nak pegi je baru ko nak datang ke?" seriously BODOH!~

ok here the things.....

1. i called u wahai ambulance yg sangat BIJAK sbb my dad was really in a bad condition...he can't wake up and he can't walk...he black out almost everytime dia vomit

2. kalau dah tau takde ambulance, kenape tak bagi tau awal2...yang kau membebel macam2 tanya itu..tanya ini at the end kau cakap ambulance takde...BONGOK! cakap terus terang la wahai si pandai!

3. kau kate umah kami dekat so elok datang sendri..hey mr! kenape manusia cipta ambulance?utk tolong org yang TAK MAMPU NAK PEGI SENDIRI! bukan nyer ktorg suka2 nak call..menggedik ajak teman shopping...this is emergency kawan!..

4.embulance takde??hey tambi! mane pegi ambulance kau yg banyak2 tuh?ok ibu ada sembang ngan MA hospital..and ibu ada complain pasal ambulance..and what he told us...dia kate...ambulance banyak sebenarnyer makcik..tapi banyak yg keluar kawasan..like johor..perak..terengganu...OMG!~ ok...maybe diaorg ade kes emergency kat sana...so tak kisah la...tapi..at least..spare kan la 2/3 ambulance kat kawasan hospital utk kegunaan kawasan2 berdekatan...ni bila ambulance takde, macam nih la jadinyer..bebel2...then at the end kate ambulance takde...tolong la...jgn la menganak tirikan kawasan keliling...tepok dahi kang!

ok..i do understand ur work..ur responsibilities but please la...u work with human life..so act like it! jgn la macam nih...maybe benda nih kena kat my family..but who know kene kat yours...mase tuh baru u tau langit tuh tinggi ke rendah...

please la spare kan at least 2 or 3 ambulance yg stand by kat hospital...anytime org akn called u utk bantuan..tolong la berpikiran make sense sikit..kadang2 benda yg make sense nih susah nak diterima pakai...tapi kadang2 make sense nih la yg bantu kita bukak minda...

love,

cmasyaz

fruits or vege??

jagung bukan sayur...and its also bukan fruits...geeeeeee....want to know what jagung ni dalam kelas aper??hahahaha

its GRAIN!!!~ weeeeeeeeeee~

*buang masa je mempertahankan hujah dengan kamoo..hahaha (:

love,

cmasyaz

rare...

Ari nih let me talk about mata....EYES??yes..eyes!! tapi ape kaitannyer dengan rare??hahahah itu lah persoalannye...sebab mata saya rare la...hahaha tak percayer??

Hari tuh g optometric....yela..plan nak wat contact lenses....kasi chantek la mata tuh konon..hehehe btw, contact lenses adalah perkara yg diperlukan pada sesiapa yg mempunyai masalah mata iaitu rabun di peringkat umur yang muda...sebab pakai cermin mata nih pun kadang2 leceh jugak...

1. makeup dah berkati2...pastuh last touch up pakai spec...so, ape gune pakai maskara yg lebat bak bulu mata palsu tuh??hmmm...

2. bile bersukan..lari-lari..lompat-lompat....bile pakai spec, kadang2 kalu spec yg dah agak2 perlu ditukar tu...tetibe jatuh...tak ke ianya mengganggu kita..bukan saje penglihatan...tapi tumpuan..

3. bile berpeluh...owh!pasti spec anda harus dilap bingkainya..lagi2 kalu yg tak pakai bingkai plastik...so besi akan cepat karat...

4. bagi yg bertudung..kerap kali ade alasan "ok, saya nak wat spec tapi xnak tudung kembang... -.-'

kenape??tak cantek la....

5. macam2 alasan lagi lah kalu tak caye cbe research sendri...

So, contact lenses adalah sangat praktikal utk orang2 yg mempunyai masalah ini...boleh makeup tebal2,leh pakai bulu mata palsu yg panjang macam model iklan tuh,leh bersukan bagai,leh bergaya dgn tudung ala2 hana tajima tuh...dan macam2 lagi.....

So, back to our topic...ape yang rarenye nih??ok...rare nyer...walaupun kite cerita pasal contact lens, tapi ade jugak manusia yg mmg tak boleh pakai contact lens...sebabnyer..bukan sebab mata dia infection ke aper...tapi sebab bebola mata dia lain dari yang lain...huhuhu contohnya adalah terang lagi bersuluh empunya blog nih la...hahahaha

My cornea is not like an ordinary cornea which is mine is not round...mine is like a bola ragbi...bola ragbi??yes!!bujur lagi ayu..hahaha =P ok..bola mata saya sangat la berbentuk bola ragbi..makanya saya tak boleh pakai lens biasa yg macam korang pakai tuh...

So aper yg menjadikannya susah ialah..

1.saya kene keluarkan duit yg agak banyak untuk membeli lens yang special nih....

2.saya tak boleh pakai lens yg berkale2...(naseb baik tuhan itu maha mengetahui..maka dia jadikan anak mata saya bewarna cokelat...weeeeeeee~)

3.saya perlu loyal kepada satu brand sahaja..kerana hanya brand tersebut yg ade wat lens utk mata2 special seperti saya ini..

4. possibilities utk tidak dapat memakai lense seumur hidup adalah sangat tinggi....kenapa?sbb ada org yg terlalu bujur bentuknya macam mata kucing...then takde len

se yg sesuai utk cengkam anak mata dia..owh.. =(

Maka....saya pun mencuba dan terus mencuba utk memakai lens....so, i went to this optic shop where i'm their regular customer...so i ask the owner of that shop do i have suitable lens disebabkan condition mata saya sebegini....so lepas dia check my power using the machine, saya pun masuk la bilik pemeriksaan...

Well...i tried almost 5 types of lense and only one suit me..lucky me!!!!~ all the four lenses bile pakai kat mata terkeluar balik in a blink...huhuhu..only one yg berjaya!!! ^^ and the owner yg periksa my eyes also senyum dengan bangganya...well...i have to use 9.0 diameter punya lense due to my eyes condition....kasihan kan...normal person yg takde masalah cornea akan pakai lens average 8.6 - 8.8 punya diameter...but me 9.0.....muahahaha...sume nak sembilan..lahir bln 9....saiz kaki pun 9 for heels...mata pun nak sembilan...so hantaan pun nanti kene ade nombor sembilan jugak la..hahahahaha RM999,999.999....muahahahah...dah macam kawen ngan prince william dah kalu hantaran hampir sejuta..hahahaha...

So..itu lah yg rarenyer...org len elok je normal..but me??huhuhu 9.o beb!!~...so...for those yg mata elok....silalah jaga mata anda betol2...kalu anda rabun..and nak pakai lens then bile check cornea problem...sure you guys akan rasa..kalau la dulu i really take a gud care of my eyes akn bagus..hmmmmm...

love,

cmasyaz

do i miss u?

someone asked me if i missed you...i did't answer it and i just closed my eyes...i just walked away...

then i whispered deep inside my heart... "sooo much"

love,

cmasyaz

she's taken ^^

Ok..whos taken who??ok..somebody has kidnap my sista from me....uhuk!!!~ wang tebusan dier mintak...tak susah..nak kawen je..hahahaha itu la die...my sista.....she's taken!!! wohoooooooo!! you are a wife now wahai cik nana..opsssss..silap..PN. NANA...hahaha

I was really excited mase hari bersejarah tuh..ye la..it was our first time kenduri kawen dalam family ktorg..sbb along anak sullung..heeeeeee~ meriah??of course! sangat meriah..mmg terbaek dari ladang! =)

Majlis berlangsung 3 hari....1st hari sabtu...majlis nikah..wohooooo..terbaeks weh..mule2 tuh plan tak nak nangis..tetibe burst!! hahaha xper...sbb saya sayang kakak saye...sangat sayang..sebab tuh nanges...hehehe =P abg zaki hebat wooo..owh abg zaki tuh abg ipar saye...hehe sekali lafaz je dah sah jadi newlywed! owh....terharu... -.- ... bape kali belatih abg??hehehe seriously on that day you looked so hani mohsin...ok..this is the first and last i say that...why i'm saying this??eiewwwwwwww!!!~ abg...wat2 tak bace okeh!

The best part mase event adalah saye takde mase amek gambar...sbb saye ade exam..thanks UITM sbb bagi waktu exam time saye nak gembire2....lari topik jap...bukan nak belagak..tapi i xstudy langsung utk exam tersebut..muahahaha....masa 2 jam tapi saya hanya menggunakan 30 minit sahaja untuk menjawab soalan esei sebanyak 3 soalan..muahahaha...hebat tak??ok..tu paper ko-ko je..tapi still...esei okeh!! yg bernilai 30 markah setiap satu..(after exam tuh mula la tangan rasa lenguh-padan muke) hahaha .... mereka semua sedang happy2 bergambar di sana...xper..demi menghabiskan kelas ko-ko yg paling saye tak suke..ape juga ku sanggup buat..sbb this sem adalah last sem tok ko-ko..hahahahaha!! PARTY!!! ^^...

Utk cerita majlis kedua dan ketiga akan di upload kemudian okeh!

love,

cmasyaz

*credit picture from my baby nikon and from our photographer anyeventphotography (kak shana n abg jidin we love u!!!)^^

to love you more...

Take me back in the arms I love

Need me like you did before

Touch me once again

And remember when

There was no one that you wanted more

Don't go you know you will break my heart

She won't love you like I will

I'm the one who'll stay

When she walks away

And you know I'll be standing here still

I'll be waiting for you

Here inside my heart

I'm the one who wants to love you more

You will see I can give you

Everything you need

Let me be the one to love you more

See me as if you never knew

Hold me so you can't let go

Just believe in me

I will make you see

All the things that your heart needs to know

I'll be waiting for you

Here inside my heart

I'm the one who wants to love you more

You will see I can give you

Everything you need

Let me be the one to love you more

And some way all the love that we had can be saved

Whatever it takes we'll find a way

I'll be waiting for you

Here inside my heart

I'm the one who wants to love you more

You will see I can give you

Everything you need

Let me be the one to love you more

i wish*

listening to the lovey dovey musics makes me feels like i'm flying to the moon..hahaha ~

i wish i can listen this song together with you.. i wish*

kalaulah aku cukup berani..

sakit kan bile perasaan tuh xdapat nak di ungkapkan...kalaulah aku cukup berani..

=(